Saturday, June 25, 2011

Leslie Vernon Wants You To Want Him (And This Ain't No Cheap Trick)

Ever feel like you actually want to get the "right" sequels made? Tired of seeing Alvin and the Chipmunks 3: Brittany does Alvin Reverse Cowgirl in the Wild West? Most of us are tired of seeing chipmunks screwing. It's not artistic. It's maddening. The only reason they didn't make a Top Gun part 2 is because they didn't want to call it Topper Gun. The third installment would be titled Toppest Gun or at least that's what Tom Cruise was told by the Scientologists right before they Kosher pickled his brain and marked it Vlasic). In a world where cartoon characters get endless sequels to their poor reduxes of our childhood classics, we can use a good sequel. A sequel made in the fan's best interest. A sequel that does not include suggestive animated animal genitalia (we all know it doesn't exist anyway).

Now I'm going to ask you to go back. Go back to the fan favorite aspiring slasher mock-doc of the the century. Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon. See the trailer below to refresh your memory and lay off the marijuana cigarettes, ya hippies.

Remember how good this movie was? Made you laugh, right? Did Alvin and the Chipmunks make you laugh? No. Remember all that shit I just said about sequels. What's getting made and by whom? Well right now you are in the producers chair. Sort of...

I urge you dear readers... the few, the proud, the bored... to hit the "Like" button on the Facebook page below. Make this your contribution to film history. By clicking the "Like" button you show support for the original, tongue firmly in cheek but still hauntingly good mock slasher bio pic turned actual slasher movie. You also show support for a budding sequel described below (from the aforementioned Facebook page):

Taylor Gentry has a score to settle, and she's not about to let a little thing like Leslie Vernon's disappearing without a trace slow her down. And so, in the immediate aftermath of the Harvest Moon killings, the hunter becomes the hunted. But even as Taylor doggedly pursues her tormentor, she slowly uncovers the deeper, darker secrets of his past, and what truly drives Leslie Vernon in his quest to be the best of all psycho-slasher killers. Mind-bending revelations of family history, sibling rivalry, and even the terrifying prospect that he may not be acting alone... as evidenced by a tattered photo of a young Leslie with a paternal twin... all drive Taylor to the very edge of madness, until she's caught once again in a frenetic race to stop Leslie's second coming and save her own soul in the process! With a slasher film first- death by rabid, stampeding rhinoceros, THIS is the horror sequel you WILL. NOT. BE. ...seeing. Come on, now. You didn't think Leslie Vernon would let his story get out before he wanted it to, did you?

So here's the real juicy part: You have the opportunity to pre-order this movie and... by pre-ordering/reserving your copy, you not only show your uber-support for the film, you help ensure that it will get made. Now there's a whole lotta Hollywood politics behind why it has to be this way. Any self-respecting horror fan knows that studios want to show you Alvin and the Chipmunks vs. Garfield vs. the KY Jelly Monster over and over and over again. Let's show Hollywood who the fuck is boss(Hold me closer Tony Danza). It sure ain't David Seville!

First for more info (because you don't trust me?). This comes straight from the Jett so get on this fast people.

HELP LESLIE VERNON RETURN! You can get his movie made!

Second, here's the page you must "Like". Like it or Leave it folks!

Before the Mask Facebook Page to "Like"

Third (mothafucka) when you're at the site above... this one:

Before the Mask Facebook Page where you go to Support B4TM

Go to B4TM and make your pre-order Before the Mask. You won't be charged unless the movie is actually made (that's what I'ms told).

In the words of Upson Pratt, "Do it. Do it now."