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Monday, January 9, 2012

NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION 2012: FULCI OR ARGENTO? CHOOSE NOW OR DO SOMETHING PRODUCTIVE INSTEAD

Hey Kiddies… Sorry for the unannounced hiatus from Dr. Terror's Blog of Horrors. On November 23, 2011 Baby Terror was born (name withheld to prevent kidnapping or undo references to actresses from the golden age of Hollywood). Since then it’s been a series of sleepless nights, bottle washing, 3am feedings and diaper changing extravaganzas. While the 3am feedings may be the perfect time to catch up on the Man from Planet X or Kingdom of the Spiders (yes I have been this lucky) it is not necessarily conducive to the creative (or lack there of) process. I’m here today to tell you that I’M BACK! Regular entries should begin in the next two weeks with the same absence of intellect and cliché ridden melodrama you’ve been used to over the last year and half.



I have missed writing. It gets the demons out. It has actually been painful not to write save for some entries over at the Blood Sprayer. With this new year I may be expanding my writing duties to a few new friends (fingers crossed) I have oodles of reviews coming at your eyeballs like a splinter in a zombie movie.

Enough! On to the central focus of this particular entry!



HAPPY MOTHER F'ING NEW YEAR!!!

(I didn't swear by choice!)


I need some help (but you knew that). We just celebrated the coming of a brand new year and the passing of a terrific year in horror fiction. While I spent the New Year’s weekend watching Twilight Zone reruns and steeping myself in some of the finer offerings off 2011, I also contemplated what I needed to change for the coming year. I do not have a body like Hugh Jackman from Wolverine (yes, I once made that resolution… I’ve got the sideburns though). I did stop drinking sugary soda (more cancer in the diet variety anyway), but the most important resolution of the year has been somewhat elusive. Each year I come up with a New Year’s Resolution that involves a horror related movie viewing theme. Last year’s resolution involved the completion of the Fangoria 300, a list of the top horror flicks as set forth by the staff of Fangoria in their #300 celebratory issue. I’ll give you the play by play on that lovely effort in the coming weeks, but let’s just say that 300 movies of this caliber will take up all of my non-Pampers related hours. How does this effect you other than you have to hear about endless hours of movie watching at Fangoria’s gunpoint? I need your help (see the first sentence in this paragraph).

From Wiki for the uninitiated:
A New Year's resolution is a commitment that a person makes to one or more personal goals, projects, or the reforming of a habit. A key element to a New Year's Resolution that sets it apart from other resolutions is that it is made in anticipation of the New Year and new beginnings. People committing themselves to a New Year's resolution generally plan to do so for the whole following year. This lifestyle change is generally interpreted as advantageous.




I have two distinct film related resolutions in mind and can’t for the death of me figure out which one makes more sense. I don’t want to give up the ghost outright, but I want assistance from you, the readers (you are reading this, right?). Please offer me your preference in planning out which movies I’ll be watching in the coming year by making the ultimate choice.

ARGENTO or FULCI!?!



Hi, I'm Dario Argento. My daughter is hot. I make creepy movies about girls who can talk to insects, faceless killers wearing black gloves and a ballet school turned an occult murder ground.


Hi, I'm Lucio Fulci. I'm dead. I make movies about boys being seduced by hot older ladies and priests dying, people coming out of the ground who are supposed to be dead who kill people and a movie about men in armor battling mythical creatures who may also be naked.

Now I assure you that this does not mean I’m going to watch the entire filmography of either of these directors (all in good time). It’s simply a vehicle by which a decision will be made. Each name represents an option for a resolution that is film related that has at least, in part, something to do with the director for whom the choice is named. Decide however you would like, but please do let me know how you would decide. Simply respond to this blog, post on my or Dr. Terror’s Blog of Horrors Facebook wall or email me your choice. I’ll count the votes and announce on Friday the 13th.

Hey, if you have an idea for a movie related resolution, post that as well. I love your creativity, but please make sure to at least cast your vote. It means a lot to me. I’ll be highlighting my progress throughout the year for whichever resolution is picked. I’m still not sure it’s even possible to do either resolution so failing is an option. I have a lot planned for this year. We’ll be tackling some of the greatest issues of Fangoria for our For Dummies articles. Reviews of 2011’s best and worst. Hell, you might even see a Vaudeville Vampire album released this year. The songs have been written; just need to get the band back together. Stay tuned, kiddies. Get ready to have your eyeballs written straight out your skull.

-Dr. “It’s Alive” Terror
I make excuses so you don’t have to.

One last note: COMCAST ON DEMAND HAS ALL THE FRIDAY THE 13TH FILMS FOR FREE!!! Pretty sure this is Fearnet the voodoo that they do so well (doesn't work so well in the third person). Enjoy!

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