LINKS TO THE PORT MANTEAU OF HORROR

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

YOU'VE GOT YELLOW ON YOU: More Giallo than Your Crayon Box Has Room For



As I delve into this genre, inch by inch, row by row, I realize that there's a reason some of these films are obscure. I suppose without a proper restoration there's no way to know what I could have potentially been watching, but the quality is lacking on some of these older prints. I'm not even talking about VHS. I'm talking about original film print, grindhouse style burn ins and film scratchs. I adore this, but I wonder what the audience is for product like this. Obscure horror/thriller genre from Italy, in less than optimal condition. Lots of boobs, but no translation to understand the plot.


It's just another day on the beat. Does that make me the giallo police?



Here's what I've been watching over the last couple o' weeks (I was on vacation last week).



ASSAULT: Some great kill sequences a with some excellent music. We're talking high action/adventure horn section stuff. The word "Satan" in movie titles in the 1970's is everywhere. This one's alt title is Satan's Playthings. That's a porn title if I've ever heard one. With poster art like this you best demand a better quality exploitation film.



BLOODSUCKER LEADS THE DANCE: This was one of the more promising movies of themore obscure releases. The composer, Giombini, made some wonderfully weird music. The antiquated look of the film is endearing. Keep an eye out for the blond with fantastic tits. I guess I was most concerned with the bad dubbing and some of the dialouge. For the record, "A man who gets sea sick is not a man at all". The director is also responsible for Bloody Pit of Horror and one of the female leads, Femi Benussi was in Strip Nude for Your Killer and Hatchet for Your Honeymoon. Fantastic boobies (did I say that already). This is a quotable flick that's fun for genre fans.



BODY PUZZLE: It's always nice to hear Ride of the Valkyries. This has a rather unusual score for this genre. It's Lamberto Bava too which means you're in for a treat (although some would say that's not guaranteed. The story falls flat through the middle of the picture, but the twist at the end makes up for it. The overall story will entertain. I still can't believe this fucking thing was made in 1992. Good gore.



CIRCLE OF FEAR: Typical detective drama and probably more characteristic of what traditional giallo actually is. It's nice to see Paulie from Rocky in a giallo. That guy just makes me smile. I still imagine him beating up on Talia Shire. Always. It's really more like a TV program than a feature length movie. The film is pretty dull and fits all stereotypes of the genre well although not the best example of any of them. Keep an eye out of the guy who is obviously Bill Pullman's stunt double.



CIAK SI MUORE: The only thing redeeming about this flick is the masked killer in ski masks toward the end. Nothing makes this movie stand out against the rest of the films of the genre. I still can't tell if the copy I watched was just bad or whether the production value was that abysmal.



DELITTO D'AUTORE: The copy I got was pretty bad. The music was blah. The half ski mask costume sucks. Let me just say this: a hammer kill with gore is not a hammer kill, but I can definitely appreciate syncing music to a hammer hit. This flick is so foreign it hurts. So dated it's painful. It's really another standard detective story/murder mystery. You've seen it a thousand times only this time without the benefit of Angela Landsbury. Car Chase... fin.

-Dr. Terror

Side note:





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