Thursday, May 29, 2014

DEATH SPA (Gorgon/MPI Blu-ray) - Bleed the Burn in Your Blu-ray Player

Right off the bat, seeing the Gorgon Video logo on a product that is released on the Blu-ray format gives me chills. I can remember watching so many favorite 80’s horror and mondo movies featuring that Medusa head riding the company logo into my eyeballs. The bumper even appears in the original aspect ratio. Not modernized. It’s just there like a piece of history. A time capsule. I can’t tell you how grateful nostalgic Doc Terror is to see little pieces of the golden age of his TV viewing revisited on a beautiful format with a rather tremendous pieces of workout horror to follow. Death Spa as released by Gorgon and MPI is a pretty damn amazing piece of work. It is a movie with which I was not previously familiar save for movie cover though the sub-subgenre of slasher features is not lost on me with Killer Workout (Aerobicide) looming large or even the Linnea Quigley Horror Workout. This particular release is truly a fun viewing experience with a whole lotta what I love about entertaining horror. That’s a word that can get lost in the mix. Entertaining. Death Spa is one entertaining slaughterfest.

Synopsis from Gorgon/MPI:

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. This one is shapely, beautiful, demonic – and dead. She’s also insanely jealous – and one by one, the beautiful people of her husband’s health club become victims possessed by her evil spirit…and each meets a grisly death. Starring Ken Foree (Dawn of the Dead) and not recommended for the squeamish, DEATH SPA is another Gorgon Video (Faces of Death) from the crypts of hell! In this spa, You’ll Sweat Blood!

So this may come off as a fairly typical knock off slasher flick with a healthy twist, but it transitions itself from the obvious boob-to-blood kill marathon into a more well thoughout piece of horror fiction. We wont’ give away the murderer, but remember that this is 1987. Everything in horror had been done, right? So why not super creative while showing plenty of skin? The kills got juicier (if not slightly redundant in this particular picture). They effects work is fun rather than realistic while being a bit over the top though not H.G. Lewis gonzo. The women… less clothes… more hot. I may as well have a big hair fetish. I probably do. I’m surprised I haven’t set Death Spa to turn on with my morning alarm clock.

For a classic piece of 80’s splatter, MPI certainly gave it some love and affection. It’s a 2K HD transfer from the original camera negative. Uncut, uncensored! It features a commentary with the director Michael Fischa, Producer Jaime Beardsley and Editor Michael Kewley as well as a superior making of feature, An Exercise in Terror. These folks really gave this film some thought, and it certainly shows. This doesn’t feel like a knock off cash grab though I’m certain all eyes are at least partially on the purse. Death Spa is a combination of the excellent time (1987 is a good vintage) with superior casting and creativity.

Between the scantily clad to no-clad spa patrons to the workout machines and amenities of death, Death Spa delivers a traditional splatter ride albeit a healthy one with higher fiber, more detoxing and will get your heart rate up several beats per minute (or blood per minute or breasts per minute). This one is strongly recommended to slasher fans, gym rats, workout junkies, perves, peeping toms and gore whores.

Pick up Death Spa now! Make it your pre-workout with your Redline drink or your post-work out along with a health dose of protein. Hell, watch it while you workout and attract all the horror fiends to your elliptical machine (that’s what I do… true story).

Any one know how many calories you burn per minute while watching Death Spa? Obviously more than a non-workout horror Blu-ray.

-Doc Terror

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