Thursday, October 15, 2015

HolidazeBlog Halloween Challenge Day 15: Favorite 2000's Horror

Well… that’s just easy isn’t it? Here’s a hint: I have the poster of my favorite 00’s Horror flick tattooed on my arm. That’s right. It’s Grindhouse. I love both movies in the double feature, Planet Terror and Death Proof though I admittedly love Death Proof more. The fake food adverts, segues, cougar rating animation, fake trailers for awesome movies I would love to see. This movie has it all and that’s even before I talk about the individual segments.

I’ll run it all down crystal clear.

Machete – turned out to be a fun full length feature though I must admit the concise trailer had everything I needed to see in the movie. Fahey as the big bad guy. Danny Trejo and Cheech Maron on the side of good even though they’re bad to the bone. Great kills. Great action. All Rodriguez

Planet Terror – is a gory, goopy, gloppy mess with all the right stars and with the perfect amount of fake aging and distortion to give the movie that old time feel. Jeff Fahey’s BBQ makes me so hungry and I wanna smoke so bad when I watch this one. It has the perfect ending, a fantastic score and nice surprises with missing reels shielding any plot that need not be shown.

Don’t – I love the Don’t flicks of the 70’s and 80’s and this Edgar Wright homage to that naming convention hits all my sweet spots. The effects and settings and creepy characters are perfect to convey exactly what the Don’t movement was all about… nothing… unrelated movies whose title was meant to be a warning in more ways than one.

Werewolf Women of the SS – I love me some Nazisploitation, but when you combine that with Sherri Moon Zombie, Bill Moseley and monster size it I just want to see that movie. When rumor came out that this one was going to go full length I salivated. I still salivate. The aesthetic is perfect and it truly captures a different time and place in cinema.

Thanksgiving – Eli Roth’s masterpiece. I love the Hostels and Green Inferno and Cabin Fever, but Thanksgiving is my favorite. Roth gave us gore, tits, the soundtrack from Creepshow complete with excellent repurposing of stings, a nice play on the holiday theme and a brilliant aging that feels real.

Death Proof – I do not enjoy the full length version of this as much as the shortened version used in Grindhouse. I love its conciseness. Death Proof has a brilliant Tarantino soundtrack, hot cars, hot women, instantly quotable and gilded with homages that need to be studied to be full appreciated. The ending is bad ass. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve almost been pulled over on my way to work while listening to the Death Proof soundtrack going way to fast in my… Hyundai Sonata. At least it’s black!

Side notes: I still want that cougar tattoo even though Chris Beaumont got it already. Critical Outcast rules. Also I want me an Acuna Boys meal or a Texas Chili Parlor Meal or a meal at Guerros. In other words I need to go to Austin now!

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