LINKS TO THE PORT MANTEAU OF HORROR

Saturday, May 26, 2012

This Ain't the Summer of Love: DR. TERROR'S SUMMER ITINERARY

It's not quite June 21st but that doesn't mean the weather isn't getting warmer. It's time to throw some ribs on the grill. It's time to put back a sixer of cold ones (even if they say non-alcoholic on them in my humble case). It's time to get ready for long, hot summer nights spent in the comfort of air conditioning watching movies and marathons of many kinds. The summer is here, and if there ain't no cure for the summertime blues than I can sure you that this is a summer of brilliant hallucinating fever that will make you sweat.




Doesn't this picture remind you just a wee bit of the opening credit sequence of Amazing Stories?

I'm not Mr. Summer. That's not to say that I don't love some beach time and a virgin Pina Colada. I love the smell of sun tan lotion (no shit). What I've come to appreciate about the hottest season we've got is the ability to enjoy the lazy days of summer. Now in recent years that's changed quite a bit for me. You have a new family and a new baby and you're less lucky to sit around watching Jaws and Twilight Zone marathons. You have to fight for time in front of the television. That's where we horror folk belong. Cold, dark places, heavily caffeinated and nearly blind. So what are my plans for the summer? Let's give it a firm run down because I don't even remember half the shit I've planned and this is the time for you to mark your calenders because if you've read to the end of the second paragraph, I can assume you give two shits (one shit will do). Get ready to go to summer camp. Get ready to NOT FORGET YOUR RUBBERS. Get ready for the summer of love... wait a minute...

 THIS AIN'T THE SUMMER OF LOVE!!!

Amidst an endless sea of barbecues I'll be making plenty of time to blog this summer. There are a couple things that I've been planning since Labor Day last year and I'm glad to share them with you now. Just remember what BLUE CHEER in your festivities (follow this link if you need a laugh):

HERE


PIRANHA 3DD: Do you know how badly I want to see this movie? I have enjoyed every incarnation of these damn movies about killer fish. Putting this series in 3D did well for the first movie. That cannot be said of half the films post-converted to 3D. Get ready for 3D boobies. 3D David Hasselhoff... 3D gore. Only problem that I've heard thus far is that it's going to be getting a very limited release. Less than 100 theaters. I better have the opportunity to see this picture. It's the ultimate in summer fun waiting to happen. Some people are waiting for Prometheus. Some are waiting for Dark Knight Rises. I want the fishy with the teeth.

Enjoy the trailer responsibly:




The Italian All-Nighter Splatter-Fest on June 9 will be my first trip to the Colonial Theater in Phoenixville Pennsylvania. This is a classic theater. It's where the goddamn Blob was filmed and they celebrate this fact ad nauseum. I warm my heart to know this place exists and that I'll be spending a night amongst a bunch of  garlic eatin' motherfuckers. What's on the docket? An eclectic pile of Italian greats in 35mm. The line up is as follows:

Nightmare
1981 – 97 min – aka Nightmares in a Damaged Brain or Blood Splash
This famous video nasty is reputed to be one of the most disturbing slasher films ever made. The blood flows in torrents when a mental patient is dosed with an experimental drug that his doctors hope will free him from the grip of homicidal mania. When it appears to work they set him free. But of course, it doesn’t work and the town is painted gleefully red in his vicious wake.

Grim Reaper
1980 – 87 min – aka Anthropophagus or The Zombie’s Rage
Directed by genre favorite Joe D’Amato, our second film also holds a place on the UK’s infamous Video Nasty list, having been banned there for being too horrific according to censors. It’s the story of a group of tourists visiting a Greek island that appears to be deserted. They soon discover that it isn’t entirely devoid of life and meet many horrific and splatter filled ends.

Screamers
1979 – 81 min – aka Island of the Fishmen
What diabolical madness is afoot on this lonesome Caribbean island? Has our hero survived two shipwrecks only to be stranded here with convicts? And what of the beautiful Barbara Bach; what does she know about the deadly fish men who now imperil our hero?

Shock
1977 – 93 min – aka Beyond the Door II
Despite the clever marketing ploy, this is not a sequel to Beyond the Door. Instead this is master Italian director Mario Bava’s final film. It’s a wicked ghost possession tale that absolutely doesn’t go where you think it is. We dare you to puzzle it out.

City of the Walking Dead
1980 – 88 min – aka Nightmare City
How can we not end an Italian Splatter Fest with a zombie film? This one’s a doozy! A nuclear accident leads to uncontrollable zombies being unleashed upon our hero, played by famed Mexican horror actor Hugo Stiglitz. Director Umberto Lenzi (of Cannibal Ferox and Eaten Alive fame) doesn’t consider this zombie film a zombie film, rather he claims it’s an anti war piece. Whatever he says, it’s got all the goods to please living dead fans.

Tickets are only $20! I've got my ticket. I hope to see you there. Let me know if you'll be attending below.  We can have a sword fight in the men's room after we down too many Peronis.

MAUSOLEUM HORROR CON in Philadelphia looks to have some damn fine vendors and film presentations. I'd love to hit this up, but may not be able to. It's a busy time at work and the end of softball season. It's going down June 15th and you can hop on over to Cinedelphia for more info. Please support this Con if you're in the area. Here's how to order...


The Syracuse Annual Horror & Sci-Fi Garage Sale: This is a thing of legend in NJ. People come from just about everywhere to spend some dough, see the obscure wares of vendors who have some fairly unique shit. Now I've not been to one yet, but this thing has a reputation (whores!). I've also heard that Vultra Video is going to release a project they've been working on called the Fumigator. Vultra's peaked my interest. 80's, Shot on Video horror is the next found footage only its probably near impossible to fuck up. We wish these guys the best. I'm tentatively scheduled to make the trek to upstate New York, but it's a bit of drive and who knows if I'll actually get my permission slip signed by the wife. Saturday June 30th you should make your way to the home of the Orange Men.

To check out Vultra Video stop by their FaceBook page HERE.



With a little luck there will be a Twilight Zone marathon on July 4th. I strongly doubt it this year, and in fact I fully anticipate sitting in front of my Droid on a beach watching episodes on Netflix streaming. We'll try to make sure we at least have a cocktail in hand. There's always Jaws right? Even thought the goddamn Blu-Ray won't be out in time for July (You can almost hear Larry yelling these beaches will be open). No definitive plans for a mini-marathon, but as the date approaches and I find out what my viewing options are I'll make a list. Check it twice and post what I'm watching.


ITALIAN HORROR WEEK: I got my start in blogging one special week, one summer not too long ago due to a good friend Kristy Jett. She was running the Italian Horror Week festivities at the Blood Sprayer at the time. Writers would contribute articles based on their own personal Italo-Horror preference. The only criteria is that they would need to involve the voluptuous films and music of Italy... horror related to be exact. I can tell you that this just might be my favorite country of origin for horror films. I'm currently attempting to watch every giallo film ever made (nearly 90 movies finished thus far). It seems like it's time to make Italian Horror Week  a very real part of Dr. Terror's Blog of Horrors. I'll be accepting submissions from guest writers, putting up a few features and maybe even running a giveaway or two. I make no guarantees for giveaways because I've never done a giveaway in the history of this establishment. It's time we live up to the status quo. In addition I'll be posting videos, music and quotes on Dr. Terror's FaceBook page and here on the BoH.  Italian Horror Week we'll ramp up on July 13th. That would be Friday the 13th motherfuckers. Let me assure you that it has everything to do with Twitch of the Death Nerve aka Bay of Blood influencing strongly and perhaps being the subject of near plagiarism by Friday the 13th (you call this an "homage"). Sean Cunningham, we adore you... MARIO BAVA SHOT FIRST ... Side note: the image you are looking for is a picture of Han Solo and Greedo from Star Wars a New Hope facing off in a gun battle with Mario Bava's Head on Greedo's body and Sean Cunningham's head on Han Solo's body... oh wait, what's this:



Read my first blog ever HERE (reposted from its original source to preserve for posterity). Special thanks to Kristy Jett for giving me her blessing on following my nerd heart, encouraging my writing and making this an annual Dr. Terror event. You can email me at grindhousehorror@gmail.com or contact me at FaceBook if we're buddies. I'll be spreading the word and scouting potential giveaways and contributors. Ciao!

Note: I want to mention this now so that you folks who are not exactly in on it keep yourselves up to date on just what Exhumed Films will be doing this summer and October. It's around this time (August) that tickets to their 24 Hour Horror-thon go on sale. These sell out. You need to buy them NOW... now being August of course. Here's a link to Exhumed Film's website where you an sign up for email updates. Other shows this summer include:

Audubon Auction House (PLEASE NOTE ALTERNATE LOCATION!)
Saturday June 23, 2012
Doors at 7:30pm, Trailers/Show at 8:00
$10 for the Double Feature

Free Parking! Info and Directions here
www.Auctionhouseshows.com

Exhumed Films Presents -

TELE-FRIGHT NIGHT: TWO TELEVISION OCCULT TERRORS FROM THE '70'S!

SPECTRE (1977) - An occult investigator seeks the help of a skeptical
friend when he's hired to look into the affairs of a family dabbling
in the black arts. This well-made television movie created by Star
Trek's Gene Roddenberry is an effective, sexy horror-thriller that
plays something like a forerunner to The X-Files. Beautifully
photographed with outstanding monster effects work by Stuart (STAR
WARS) Freeborn. Starring Robert Culp, Gig Young, John Hurt and Jenny
Runacre. NOT AVAILABLE ON DVD!

&

THE CAT CREATURE (1973)- Director Curtis (DEVIL DOG: THE HOUND FROM
HELL, NIGHT TIDE) Harrington, working from a script by horror legend
Robert (PSYCHO) Bloch, tells the story of a missing Egyptian mummy, a
priceless amulet and the gruesome fates that befall those involved. A
fun, tongue-in-cheek fright-fest with an enjoyable cast including
Meredith Baxter, David Hedison, Stuart Whitman, John Carradine, Kent
Smith, Keye Luke and celebrity lookalike Peter Lorre, Jr.! NOT
AVAILABLE ON DVD!

Upcoming Shows SAVE THE DATE FOR THE UNSTOPPABLE EXHUMED 24hr FEST!
Saturday, October 27 - Sunday, October 28 2012



Joseph A. Gervasi (of Exhumed Films/Diabolik DVD) & International
House Philadelphia present:
POSSESSION
Directed by Andrzej Zulawski 1981
Starring Isabelle Adjani and Sam Neill

Saturday, July 28, 2012.

One night only!
Advance tickets will be sold.

This is the Philadelphia premier of the new, uncut, 35mm print. It
will destroy you.

Also featured: Short films/videos from talented young Philadelphia
filmmakers/artists such as Isaac Williams, Justin Miller, and
Cinedelphia's Eric Bresler.

Here's a trailer for Isaac Williams' SIMON SAYS, a short film we'll be running:
http://vimeo.com/33197979

Catering by the Blowfish Bakery.

Collector Jeff McGivney will be bringing some of his international
POSSESSION posters and lobby cards to be set up in the lobby.

Here's the trailer for POSSESSION:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xxVdtYAs8-w&feature=youtu.be



MEETING OF THE LOSERS CLUB: There were rumors... he was into field hockey players... ENOUGH! I may not be as cool as Kim Deal, but coming this August there may just be a meeting of a small group of us bloggers and friends somewhere in New York. I don't think you can call it an event. It's more like a happening. With no firm plans only a date in mind, let's see what we can come up with. We absolutely need to video tape and post our findings as they happen. Keep your eyes out for more on this. It's best to order enough popcorn to last you the entire weekend.



MONSTER-MANIA!!!: I'd love to give my RSVP to this now, but I can't actually confirm it due to the meeting of the Losers Club and my wife' birthday bash (she'll be 30!). Looks like a veritable Hellraiser reunion, Tom Savini, John Russo... it's gonna be pretty good especially for zombie movie fans. Check it out HERE. If I'm going then I'm gonna be armed with my convention sack and maybe... :gasp some business cards. I'll be looking for more VHSPS to feature on IT CAME FROM 1980 X, back issues of Fango and indy horror to support.

DEAD 'TIL DAWN: Drive-In Movie Zombie-a-thon bitches! We're talking Zombie, Gates of Hell, Burial Ground,  Night of the Zombies and City of the Walking Dead. This is up in Coxsackie, NY and we'll see if this comes to fruition. It's actually just out of season taking place September 29th. It's another all nighter and just a month later we'll be spending time in the iHouse for the Exhumed 24 Hour Horror-thon. Make sure to get more info on this event HERE. I can't imagine a better collection of flicks and this would mark the second time this very year that I would get to see City of the Walking Dead on the big screen in one year!

Those are the big ticket events. I'd also like to rummage around Blairstown, NJ and do some Friday the 13th snooping... maybe even the weekend of Friday the 13th. It's only 35 minutes from my house. I also may try to make it out to Amityville, NY this summer. I think it's important. The Amityville Horror was one of my favorite books as a kid and I need to see the damn house, no matter how modified in the flesh. I'll be saving the Sleepy Hollow and Pennhurst Asylum for October. Consider them historical trips. There's a slight chance of making it to Salem July 4th weekend. Also, find my at Hot Dog Johnny's at least once a month for the entire summer. I can't get enough of those peanut oil cooked dogs with mustard and pickle.


Let's leave this blog with the Doctor's prescription for a fucking awesome summer... some Queens of the Stone Age and a big ol' bottle of whatever poison you're enjoyng these days.


Dr. Terror With the Cure for the Summer Time Blues

2 comments:

  1. You lucky sumbitch. How do you get all that cool shit in your area over the summer? Not fair. Anyway, I can't wait to see Piranha 3DD either.

    ReplyDelete
  2. It's all within 2-3 hours. Philly has an amazing film community too. It's painful because you miss sooooo much.

    ReplyDelete